A profession for shedding tears

If there were a profession for shedding tears,

I will most likely sit square

Like a queen at a ball, as the queen of the ball

For whose purpose all gather near

 

I could shed a tear for myself or another

For pain I feel, will feel and felt before

For fiction and true life

 

When vexed, frustrated or sorely embarrassed.

You see, I’ll rather do so than hurt another

With pain I feel but not caused by this other

‘Tis what He will have us do you know

He who seats in the heavenly throne

 

I tire from pain

From struggles and upset

There the tears come pouring forth

Like a severe that breaks the dermis

Like blood flow so the tears go

A release of tension no doubt

A freedom from heaviness

 

If there was a profession for shedding tears

I will be a pioneer as I have shared

The in-depth knowledge of itself

Known to me by reason of experience

Disappointment is a place

Disappointment knows my name.

How do you find out someone’s name?

Sometimes by word of mouth

(but to whom does it speak?)

Per chance, you read it someplace,

(but really does it read?)

Perhaps it is a misconception

It doesn’t know my name.

On second thought, of course it doesn’t!

Then how are we acquainted?

 

In normal circumstances, it should sadden your heart,

Nowadays, it makes me smile

How so? You might want to know

Hear me, says I, that you may know

That when a door is slammed in my face,

It is a reminder of where I ought to go, is yet unknown to me

 

Disappointment is a place,

It isn’t visited, it isn’t traced

It’s simply a time in place, a place in time

An interface

Mine is for me…

Many have desired my body but mine desires my being.
Many have come and claimed shared belief but mine is berthed right within.
We are joined together, never unsheathed but simply with our organs of speech.
We are combined and complete we see into each other.
There is no one else, in each other’s eyes.
The knowledge of temporary meetings is lost in the desire for forever.
Mine is for me…

How I desire you!
Not in my loins, more than with my heart.
It is a place I have never known.
I seek to speak to it and inquire of where it has been all these days. I indulge my mind in trying to define it.
I fail endlessly.
Mine is for me…

Confident trust, loving pride, peaceful love.
This is all I see

There is no better

There is no better day than today

To free my mind from inhibitions

There is no better time than now

To rid myself of uncertainty

No more perfect day than today

To step into the unknown…

Can you hear the wind?

In your ears, it fills your lungs then frees your mind

It carries, it lifts. It  is exhilarating

Fear becomes non-existent

This place in the skies becomes me

I free myself. I realise: I am flying.

It all began yesterday

It all began yetserday.

She didn’t see it coming,

she heard the sound then felt the pang.

She sought to inquire but already knew the reply.

She began to fade into yesterday.

Where pain was not known where laughter did not cease.

Where words were not lost in hiccups of tears.

Where loss was not a close relation, let alone a distant friend.

Then she left yesterday, returned by the cry of an infant whom she placed on her bosom.

Then she returned to yesterday and there, she remained.

So they took the babe from her bosom.

She could hear its crying no longer…

Pleasures

They came and left like they owned where they dwelt.

They appeared with feverish anticipation and flicks of pain.

More pain more pleasure, more pain more pain more pleasure the voices screamed.

So they came as an outpouring, gushing without end.

They ran around seeking whom to seek, indeed one who sought them

They hoped to last forever.

Alas! It could not be, for they were but for a moment

Baby

She was shaking uncontrollably.

 

‘What’s wrong with you?’ he asked, ‘If it’s too uncomfortable, or a girl thing why don’t you tell your mummy then she can tell me later.’ She managed to shake her head. He looked at his wife and she had the same worry on her face that he could feel. ‘Sweetie what’s wrong?’ his wife asked softly. She stood up to cross the room. As she began to stretch her arms out to embrace her baby she heard a shrill sound that sounded like ’I’m pregnant’.

 

As she stood there frozen trying to get over the shock, she heard a thunderous ‘What???’ from behind her. Apparently, her husband didn’t have the problem she had getting over it. As she turned sideways to get a look at both her child and husband she saw him charge towards her. ’Are you mad?’ he shouted ‘How many seconds have you been in university that you have the audacity to do this to us; you’re now a big girl abi?’ Just as he was about to start pounding her face, he felt his wife screaming and pulling him away. ‘Please, please! No, not like this…’ she was sobbing like a baby, trying to get a grip on him. He turned around and gently but firmly pulled her off him and stormed out of the room.

 

Mma watched her mother sink to the floor as her father furiously left the room. She realised moments afterwards that her ears were still ringing from the sound of the slammed door. She slowly got on her knees and began to crawl to where her mother sat sobbing. ’I’m sorry mummy’, she said. Her mother raised her head from the sofa it was buried in and made to beckon to her but thought better of it. There they sat weeping and listening as her father threw things all over the place upstairs. ‘Who is he?’ she heard her mother shout. She jumped more because she realized that that was the second time she had said it. She hesitated and for the first time during this her hour of doom, she actually felt raw fear enveloping and sweeping through her. In a near whisper, she said ’It’s my boyfriend……. Obiora’. Her mother’s scream brought her father running downstairs.

 

That night nobody slept in the Nwanya residence. Abu mostly because of the mosquitoes, so he spent most of his time parading the perimeter of the compound and wondering why his oga that will be up in three hours was still awake by 3am. As Dike paced his room floor, he felt his wife’s eyes watching him. When he had gotten up first four hours ago, he had told himself she was asleep but after a while gave that up and just put on the light. He couldn’t look at her because he felt that it was up to him to solve this and do something about it. Think of a plan, deal with the situation but all he could think of was a 30 year old man on top of his teenage daughter. It just didn’t make any sense: according to her it had been her first time (that wasn‘t a surprise, that‘s exactly how she was born),